Let's start with humor today. As the Bible says, “Laughter is good medicine.” So my strategy is to make you laugh and when your mouth opens, I'll put the medicine in it. All you brave souls, keep reading!
“When I was a kid, my bedtime was 9 p.m. I couldn't wait to be an adult so I could go to bed whenever I wanted. On a cold winter morning, a wife texts her husband that the window is frozen and won't open.” . Her husband emailed me back and said, “Gently pour warm water over it and gently tap the edges with a hammer.'' Ten minutes later, I received an email from my girlfriend's wife. “My computer really went crazy.” “Are you mad at someone? Think before you speak. If the person is younger than you, count to 10 before speaking. If the person is the same age as you. If the person is your senior, count to 50 before speaking. If the person is your wife, keep counting. Don't speak.'' Ta.
This week I noticed a poster on social media that said, “Let us seek an encounter with a God who not only affirms us, but transforms us.” Note that the author does not say it is an affirmation or a transformation. It was both an affirmation and a transformation. This statement perfectly captures what is happening in our culture today. Our current culture is intended to affirm others, but not necessarily to transform them. Let me explain.
I think of the human condition on three levels: negative, neutral, and positive. The idea is to move people from negative to neutral and from neutral to positive. We are all born to win, but many of us have been conditioned to lose by obstacles and conditioning. So how did God design the process of moving from negative to neutral to positive or “why me?” to “What’s next?”
Let's start with those who think they have a deficit and want and need to build up. Having a negative season doesn't make them any less valuable than other players, but they are in a season that is considered negative. they are hurt. They are surviving, but not thriving. There are events that shape their lives and create lingering effects that disable them mentally, emotionally, physically, or spiritually. The minus is not themselves. Negative refers to what happened to them or how they are mentally and emotionally.
When I was a singles ministry pastor at Grace Community Church in Tempe and Northwest Community Church in Phoenix, I experienced people coming into our groups who were devastated. I was single again, with no money, and separated from my children. It was lower than the belly of a snake. They were in that negative season. But after several years of affirmation and subsequent transformation, these previously negative singles have changed from the inside out.
So how do we approach people in negative seasons and empower them to transition into neutrality? I learned that it starts with affirmations. you connect with them. Build relationship bridges and get over it. The four basic human needs that children from newborns to early teens need to prepare for “What's next?” It's about importance, acceptance, love, and safety. You affirm that they have real value. You affirm that they are acceptable. You affirm that they are loved. You help give them a sense of security. It is a time of affirmation and high support. This is a time to have hope and feel good about life and the future. It takes time and patience, but being “called” to this service can help.
The problem in today's highly sensitive world is that forever affirming something that hurts a person tends to turn that person from negative to neutral and then remain neutral. When you get people to a place where they feel good about themselves and are ready to move from neutrality, you move from affirming people to transforming them. Change takes them from neutral to positive.
The Bible uses this concept in Ephesians 4:11-13. The term the Bible uses is “to prepare the saints for the work of ministry.” Equipping is a practical approach to not just informing people, but shaping them for service and careers. Equipping means getting personal with the person. That is change. It's not a touch. It's a change. It's not a promise. It's practical. It's not easy; sometimes, it can be difficult. It requires commitment, better choices, honest self-evaluation, and truth encounters. Transformation is when God transforms confusion into a messenger's message.
Why is change difficult? If it doesn't challenge you, it won't change you. The change I'm talking about is getting a job, repairing a broken relationship, getting off welfare, turning our story into an act of service and blessing to others, or simply It may feel good to start over. That's an accomplishment.
So let's summarize this by talking about the church area. Thirty years ago, many churches were simply interested in changing without affirming people in negative groups. It seems harsh and cold. Today, many churches grant people 52 Sundays a year, but they rarely lead people to change. Everyone likes affirmation and positivity, which is good for attendance, but not so good for spiritual growth and personal change. The answer is both. Affirmation is the first (transition from negative to neutral), transformation is his second (transition from neutral to positive).
This same idea applies to social services and welfare. Affirming people in negative situations and helping them hurt is a great starting point because it is necessary. But continuing to help those who hurt you without transforming when you become neutral creates codependency and ultimately becomes destructive.
Friends of Teen Challenge are great examples of affirmation and transformation at the right time to free people into their purpose, mission, and destiny. That's how Jesus did it, and dare I say it, we can do it too.
Ed Delph is the author of ten books, a pastor, teacher, former business executive, and speaker. He has traveled widely and has visited over 100 countries. He is the Chairman of NationStrategy, a nonprofit organization dedicated to uplifting and transforming communities around the world. For more information, visit nationstrategy.com.
Contact him at nationstrategy@cs.com.
