“It's definitely gotten easier going through it together. And I think it's a lot safer,” Gilbert said.
When you're traveling, it can feel like there's an increased risk of meeting someone through a dating app. Crossing language barriers, moving away from established social networks, and exploring uncharted territory leave travelers more exposed to scams and potentially dangerous encounters.
The U.S. Embassy in Bogotá, Colombia, recently warned travelers to be careful when using dating apps following the suspicious deaths of eight U.S. citizens in Medellin late last year. According to a statement from the embassy, ”incidents in which victims, usually foreign nationals, are lured using online dating apps and then robbed by force or sedated and drugged. ' is increasing. Early last year, the U.S. Embassy in Kingston, Jamaica, warned U.S. travelers about robberies facilitated by dating apps.
Why dating apps are dangerous
Several recent studies have shown that dating apps can pose significant risks to users, regardless of where they are located.
With limited vetting, catfishing and other scams allow people to pretend to be someone else. Dating apps facilitate instant interaction with more people than, say, a night out at a bar, which can increase your chances of encountering the bad guys.
“We realized that it was kind of an open hunting ground,” said Roberts, a longtime forensic nurse and sexual assault certified nurse examiner at the University of Utah. Julie Valentine, a professor who studies violence, said:
A recent study she conducted compared sexual assaults caused by dating apps to acquaintance sexual assaults, or incidents known as date rapes. The study found that app-based assaults more often result in violence and physical injury, and also include higher rates of assault against vulnerable groups, such as people with self-reported mental illness and gay men. There was found.
Valentine and other experts agree that no matter where dating apps are used, it's important to proceed with caution.
“The reality is that the extra precautions you take abroad should be taken in the United States as well,” said Blaine Anderson, a professional dating coach.
Anderson stresses that strangers can be “potentially dangerous,” but she has also used dating apps in 24 countries. Dating apps continue to be a great way to meet people while traveling, especially as the lines between in-person and online social lives become more blurred.
Many dating experts agree that the burden of safety should not be placed on dating app users or at-risk daters. One Valentine said she was hesitant to “add it to the list of safety guidelines,” saying doing so could lead to victim blaming.
These extra steps can be especially burdensome for women, who face more risks when using dating apps than men.
Still, you can reduce the risks of dating by taking additional safety measures.
“While it's not the victim's fault in any way, there are things you can do to keep yourself safe when it comes to traveling, online dating abroad, social discovery, finding friends, etc.,” CEO Hannah Simko said. said. The best of apps like Tinder and Hinge are part of the Online Dating and Discovery Association, an industry group responsible for establishing practices.
Are your dates who they say they are?
Anderson encouraged travelers to verify the identity of potential dates before meeting someone on the app. Do you know where they work? What school did they attend? Is it Google-enabled? Does their profile have Facebook linked?
“I'm not saying you need to stalk everyone you meet online,” she said. “These are just some of the common ways to verify someone's identity.”
Some apps also allow users to view their own profiles. This is a widespread practice, with some relying on one-time selfie authentication, others requiring users to provide a government ID, and still others conducting background checks on users in specific countries But it can be a helpful, if imperfect, resource for traveling daters.
For example, Match Group, the parent company of Hinge and Tinder, uses video prompts rather than still images to improve the accuracy of its photo verification service.
Share your location with family and friends
While dating, it's a good idea to keep in touch with your friends and lover. When Gilbert went on double dates in places like Prague while studying abroad, his roommate accompanied him. However, the two also shared their location with other friends as an extra precaution.
Experts also urged gatherings only in very public places, such as coffee shops in crowded and populated areas. People were advised to refrain from hiking, less crowded areas of the city, and going to their date's apartment or home.
Protect personal information
Anderson encouraged women and other more vulnerable users of dating apps to avoid sharing too much about themselves on their profiles to avoid information falling into the wrong hands.
Mr. Simko also encouraged all users to keep important personal information private, saying, “Please do not include your license plate or house number, and do not include your hotel in the image.” Please do so.”
It is important to stay informed of local recommendations, including messages from the U.S. embassies in Colombia and Jamaica.
In these cases, the app may also send you a safety warning. For example, Tinder “aggressively sent in-app messages to users visiting Colombia reminding them to prioritize safety when meeting someone on and off the app,” Match Group spokeswoman Kayla Whaling said. There is.
Grindr offered a similar message to users in Colombia. “At a time when violence is on the rise, Grindr is leveraging its platform to launch an in-app campaign to alert users to security threats and remind them how to stay safe online and in person,” a spokesperson said. said Sarah Bauer.
Dating app users can also review the safety guidelines for their selected apps as an additional resource and report potential malicious actors through each app's reporting process.
While you can't always tell if a date has harmful intentions, it's important to continually check in with how the situation makes you feel. Valentine said many of the people who see her at her clinic feel she is fine with dating until it becomes dangerous.
Anderson, the dating coach, said that while cultural norms differ from country to country, travelers should prioritize their own safety over fear of failure.
“While traveling, other cultures may have different nuances and different expectations. Overall, the most important thing is your comfort,” she said. “If someone is making you uncomfortable, even if you think it's a cultural norm or expectation, you should remove yourself from the situation. … Don't worry about being rude. Your safety is at stake. If not, please leave.”
